I had a brilliant idea the other night, when talking with some mates about the election and reality TV.

Gather a dozen or so Prime Minister hopefuls and put them in a house in a Queensland amusement park. Televise it, use the standard Big Brother model. Get the house people to do chores: eyebrow clipping, mini-debates, cleaning toilets, conserving water… Introduce some interesting plot elements to rile them up a bit: a terrorist scare in the house to get them alert not alarmed, some kind of medical emergency, budget problems… Make sure to film them fighting with each other and all the standard gossip and backstabbing – but these people are professionals at it, so that will make for great TV.

Every week, vote someone out of the house on national TV. Invite Pauline Hanson to host. The last person left in the house wins a Holden and becomes Prime Minister.

A mysterious rectangular cloud rapidly appeared and disappeared over Northern Australia on Sunday around 5pm.

from the The Age weather website.

While satellite pictures clearly show its dramatic formation and dissipation, there have been no local news reports in any of the local papers in the affected cities. I can’t understand why such an odd meteorological event has gone by without some in-depth reporting, except perhaps that it’s a cover-up by conspiratorial weatherpeople nationwide.

Northern Australians: Be alert (but not alarmed) to abrupt changes in your local weather. Melbnians, don’t worry, such changes are normal.

Well this is interesting. There was a sighting of a mushroom cloud over northern North Korea on Thursday. It was pretty big at 2.1km across, and it left a mighty big hole in the ground that can be seen by satellite.

But, according to various politicians, it wasn’t nuclear.

There are other ways to generate a mushroom cloud, but the most likely and popular is nuclear. Maybe they got hit by a large, undetected meteorite or a Martian heat ray.

It’s making me a wee bit nervous anyway. Not necessarily because of what North Korea might do (as I doubt they can do much), but by what the dangerously trigger-happy (and currently electioneering) USA might want to do about it.

Unabashed literalist that I am, I really enjoyed a story in the (formerly Manchester now London) Guardian newspaper about a real underground cinema in Paris.

It’s built into the city’s massive underground catacombs, and featured a professionally installed electrical system, at least three phone lines, and a full bar. The storage room had a large collection of films, dating from the 1950s until quite recently.

The cinema was quite a surprise for a group of people employed to patrol the tunnels. They stumbled upon it one day, having had no idea it was there. The day after they found it, they came back to find it emptied of anything not nailed down, and a note reading “Do not try to find us”.

I love that.

I went to a little camera place today to get my passport photo taken, and the Korean lady and I got to talking about which country I prefer. She really likes Australia, but isn’t fond of Melbn. She really likes Perth. I asked her why she doesn’t live there instead, and she said “no jobs”. That’s why I’m here too.

Here’s an idea I got a few weeks ago in the pub:

Fact – Very few people actually like living here, and are just here because of jobs.
Fact – Real estate in Melbn is too expensive.

Idea – Pick a day, and convince all the major companies to up and move to, I don’t know, Port Douglas or something on that day. The entire city of Melbn will up and move somewhere warmer. The jobs will move too, because all of the employers will move. Everyone will be happier, living in a more beautiful place with better weather. Real estate prices in Melbn will plummet, because no one will be left here. Phone and mail service will continue as normal, because Telstra and Australia Post will be among the companies moving. We can take the 3000-series postcodes with us, as well as most of the 03 area code. People who really like cooler weather can move to Hobart, which is an excellent little city anyway, and needs a few more people.

Check out those stairs! The new Osaka Apple Store (second to open in Japan) has a dramatic set of spiral glass stairs. The store has already opened, and there’s a good play by play of the opening day by a somewhat obsessive but entertaining fan.

The pervert in me thought “woo woo a glass bridge!” but it looks like the glass is somewhat frosted to prevent that kind of thing.

Mad props out to V.Alex for the links.

This coming weekend’s weather:

Now, while I agree that “showers gradually clearing” is indeed “cool”, I am a bit concerned with the editorialising on the The Age weather page.